February 29, 2024

My in-laws and me

It's crazy love!
Like what, the legend of the family Naughty and possessive mother-in-law and castrating does not concern you ... And so much the better! For you, everything went well. From the first meetings, your in-laws have given you a warm welcome, you have been quickly accepted.
Why ? Maybe because Therese is relieved not to see her darling son end old boy, because Francois is proud that his son was a "pretty young" or because Alice and Juliet are delighted to see a new beautiful arrive - to whom they will be able to confide!
As a result, Sunday lunches, almost daily phone calls and holidays together are not chores. Your man, who is very family, is pleased with these peaceful relations and does not need to assume the role of referee. Hope this happens as well between your family and him...
Attention anyway relations too fusional! You learn to know and love your husband's relatives over time, but they do not replace your family ! Your mother-in-law is a little too much and interferes in your privacy? Know how to put it back in its place: you do not expect her to replace your mother ...
It does not pass at all ...
For you, unfortunately, it's the opposite scenario. Your friend warned you: "You'll see, they're not easy!". And indeed, you could see, the first contact was not warmest. Since then, nothing has really changed, you feel more tolerated than accepted.
Why ? Maybe because your mother-in-law did not expect her son to get involved so quickly, or at least with you, because your stepfather does not appreciate how you dress or does it. that you lead a working girl career, because your sisters-in-law are jealous of this perfect line or your last follies that you exhibit before their eyes ... Reasons, there can be thousands, and you you will not escape ...
Examples: They come from a bourgeois background, or rather peasant, and not you. They are very religious, and not you (or vice versa). They had been strongly attached to the ex of your husband, and you are all his opposite. They have a little outdated values ​​and a slightly dusty image of the woman and you are too modern, extroverted and emancipated to their liking. Is ! That they do not accept you, it will not change your way of thinking or your way of acting. You do not need their consent to live your life the way you want.
One thing is certain: your in-laws were not ready to welcome a new member, and unless you were a saint, another you would have suffered the same judgments. We must therefore do with: attend them as little as possible, do not let their hasty judgments demoralize you, encourage your husband to defend you, do not prevent him from seeing them and in comparison, thank Heaven for having grown up in a family populated by open and warm people ...
Audrey, 29 years old, saleswoman
"I was very lucky, I came across a very open and welcoming in-laws, my husband lost his dad when he was young, but his brothers, his mother, and his father-in-law were immediately adorable with me, we see them often, almost every weekend, and with them I can stay myself, no need to force me to be someone else to make a good impression, I know them all and I know that in case of trouble I can call on them. family it's done for that! "
Bénédicte, 34, maths teacher
"Unfortunately for me, my in-laws were very attached to my man's ex." After a painful separation for everyone, the "new" (me) was not really welcome in the family. After almost three years of relationship, they still consider me a fad and do not believe in our story. I know that my man does not let himself be influenced by his parents, but it is painful not to have his place and to constantly hear about the old! I hope that with time they will open a little to me. They'll have to accept me, we'll get married next fall! "
Assia, 26, housewife
"I really like the family from my husband. His brothers and sisters are like mine, and we all get along very well overall. Only mother-in-law can resist.She did not like that we get married so quickly and that her little boy (the youngest of family) become a man when she was not ready. However, she has not been asked for her opinion ... She continues to tell him what to do, what to think, and give me advice to live with him. I let it be said, it feels good to feel useful, but once the door of the house closed, the mistress, it's me! "

SL: "Help! My In-laws Are Ruining My Marriage!" (February 2024)